The Longing Within (Desire for Discipline Book 3) Page 12

  “I’m used to being busy. I like getting up and getting dressed up and going to the office. I like separating the two most important parts of my life.”

  “I get it, but things have changed now, and the quicker you adjust to those changes, the happier you’ll be. Now, why don’t you get changed and we’ll go out to dinner? When we get back, I’ll make a list of some things you can do to occupy your time.”

  Reluctantly, she got up and walked into the bedroom. After a quiet dinner at one of their favorite restaurants, they returned to the condo and John went into the kitchen. When he joined her in the bedroom a short time later, he handed a piece of paper to her.

  “What’s this?” she asked.

  “Some suggestions for you,” he replied. “These are only a few ideas to get you started, but I expect you to either use this list or create a schedule of your own. I won’t tolerate this attitude of yours forever. I’ve tried to be patient and understanding and let you grieve the loss of your job, but the time has come to move past it. You can’t wallow in self pity forever. It was just a job, in the grand scheme of things, and there will be other jobs.”

  She laid the list on the table and turned away from him. It was the first time she had skipped a good night kiss and cuddles since they’d been married.

  John sighed and went out of the room, leaving her to wallow in her own self pity.

  He was gone the next morning when she woke up. There was a fresh pot of coffee with a note attached to it in the kitchen. She picked up the sticky note and read the words he’d written for her that morning.

  Good morning, my love. I trust you slept well. I’ll be home at six. No repeats of yesterday. Have a productive day. Love, John

  “Crap!” she exclaimed as she took a mug from the cupboard and filled it with coffee. Two cups later and she forced herself to get up and shower. When she had dressed, she picked up her cell and called Joanne.

  “Hey, Lyndsey, I’m sorry I haven’t checked in with you. This packing and moving is hard work.”

  “I can imagine. When do you plan to leave for Blake’s?” she asked.

  “Next weekend if all goes as planned. He’s coming to help and we decided to rent a U-haul and do it ourselves.”

  “If you’d like a break, we could do lunch today. I can help with something maybe.”

  “That sounds wonderful. Meet me at O’Charley’s at one.”

  “The one close to you?” she asked.

  “Yes, that one,” Joanne replied. “I’ve really got to run if I’m to get all my errands done before we meet. See you in a few hours.”

  “Okay.” Lyndsey put her phone back in her purse and got up to make the bed. She picked up the clothes lying around and moved to the kitchen, where she rinsed the stack of dishes in the sink and placed them in the dishwasher. She went through every room of the condo, picking up and straightening before she went back to the bedroom to get ready for her lunch with Joanne. It was a start. She still had no motivation, but she knew she had to at least make a minimal effort or she would face the wooden paddle again, she was sure. John was right; his patience was going to wear thin soon.

  With a sigh, she left the house and drove to the restaurant to meet her friend. Joanne was waving to her from the front of the building.

  “How are you?” Joanne asked as she hugged her. “I was so worried about you.”

  “It was a blow to me, that’s for sure, but let’s go inside and find seats and get comfortable before we get into all that.”

  Several minutes later, they had been seated and had placed their order. Joanne looked at her and smiled. “Now, tell me, what’s really going on?”

  “I don’t know, Joanne, I just didn’t see it coming. I feel like I’m at loose ends. I have no idea what to do next. There are no similar jobs in this area. John is adamant about staying here. So, where do I go from here?” she asked.

  “You could always freelance,” Joanne suggested. “There are always jobs that can be done from home, editing, marketing, writing, any number of things. Have you considered that? And do you have to stay in this business? Your degree is in journalism, so why not try a newspaper or a magazine?”

  “Good point. I guess I could check out some of the local newspapers and look into some magazines to see if they are hiring. What about you? Have you given any thought to what you’ll do once you get settled at Blake’s?” she asked.

  “Not at all, I’m not in any hurry. I’ve got the money from Darwood and my savings to get me through. Rooming with Blake will save on expenses. I’m just going to wait and see what’s available. Unlike you, I don’t necessarily feel that I have to stay in publishing. I’m open to something new.”

  Their salads arrived and after drizzling dressing on hers, Lyndsey spoke again. “I know you all think I’m going a little overboard over this whole thing, but I really thought I’d be at Starlight for years to come.”

  “I know you loved your job, and your authors, but Starlight and Darwood aren’t the only game in town. Spread your wings, explore the options. You owe it to yourself to prove to Darwood’s hatchet woman you can do it. They’ll be sorry they ever let you go.”

  “Wouldn’t that be karma?” she asked with a giggle.

  After lunch, she offered once more to help her friend, but Joanne declined, saying that most of the major packing and planning was finished. “We’ll get together again before I leave, I promise. Maybe you and John can come by next weekend while Blake is here to pack me up.”

  “That sounds funny, he’s just going to pack you up and take you home with him.”

  “Basically, yes,” Joanne said with a grin.

  “I’m sure we’ll be by. Love you, girl,” Lyndsey said as she hugged her friend once more.

  Well, John, I’ve accomplished something today. Now, I can go home and do nothing for the rest of the afternoon, she thought as she drove back to the condo.

  She had no sooner arrived home when the phone rang.

  “Hello,” she said breathlessly.

  “You’re out of breath. Did I catch you at a bad time?” Maeve asked.

  “I just came in from lunch with Joanne. She’s moving next weekend and I wanted to see her.”

  “I had a call from John. If you don’t mind, I’d like to stop by in a little while. I think I have a suggestion to help your situation.”

  “I really wish he hadn’t done that. I was going to tell you myself…tomorrow.”

  “Honey, it’s been days and you hadn’t told me. I’ll be there soon.”

  Damn it! She hung up the phone and put on a fresh pot of coffee. Taking cookies out of the cupboard, she arranged them on a tray, got out two plates, two mugs and napkins and sat down to wait for her adoptive mother to arrive.

  “Come on in,” she said when she answered the door thirty minutes later. Maeve had wasted no time.

  Maeve hugged her and said, “Now, let’s sit and chat, why don’t we? I understand this job thing has upset you greatly.”

  “This ‘job thing’ as you all refer to it, was a major part of my life. Come in the kitchen. I have coffee and cookies for us.”

  The two women sat down and began to talk over coffee. Maeve broke the ice by saying, “Do you remember a young girl so full of hope about writing a novel? I do. I remember her well. She chose Journalism as her major in college because she just knew she had it in her to become an author.”

  “That was a pipe dream, Maeve. Nothing more, and when I graduated, I realized that. I grew up and I set new goals for myself, for my career. I found exactly what I needed at Starlight.”

  “I understand you feel as if the rug was pulled out from under your feet. Starlight Publishing is no more. It’s been taken over by a much larger, ruthless company. Darwood didn’t know what they were doing by letting you go, but they will find out. Because my sweet, intelligent girl is going to show them,” Maeve said defensively. “My girl is going to sit down and write that book. She’s going to sign with a publisher and Darwood is going t
o beg her to come to them.”

  Lyndsey feigned a laugh. “Wishful thinking, Maeve,” she said as she poured more coffee for them.

  “It doesn’t have to be. It can become a reality. Why not do some freelance work while you work on the book?”

  “Joanne mentioned something similar to that. She said I should check into working for a newspaper or writing for a magazine.”

  “Perhaps you could do a weekly column. I know some people at one of the local papers. Something you’re interested in, I know, you can write about writing.”

  “I don’t know, Maeve. I suppose I could look into it. As for writing a novel, I just don’t know if I have it in me right now.”

  “It might be the very thing you need. Write what’s in your heart.”

  “We’ll see.”

  “I should go. You’ll probably need to start dinner soon. Come by anytime. Now that your time is your own for a little while, we can do a shopping day soon, before you get busy with that book.” Maeve stood up and hugged her.

  “I’ll walk you out,” Lyndsey said as she stood up.

  When she’d said goodbye and closed the door, Lyndsey walked back into the kitchen to clean up from their snack. She looked in the freezer and took out some boneless chicken breasts to put on the grill later. At least John wouldn’t walk into a mess and no food another night. It had been a rather busy day.

  Chapter Sixteen

  Several more days went by. Lyndsey had finally stopped sulking, but was no closer to finding employment or starting a book. John had been more than patient with her.

  “Come on, I want to get there in time to help them load the U-haul,” John said as she lay in bed.

  “Okay, okay, it will only take me a few minutes to run through the shower and throw on some clothes,” she replied as she reluctantly threw off the covers.

  After a quick breakfast of bagels and coffee, they were on the way across town to meet Blake and Joanne.

  “Hey, just in time to start carrying boxes,” Joanne said as she placed a box of dishes in Lyndsey’s hands.

  “Just set those boxes down by the truck. Now that John’s here, I think we should load your furniture first,” Blake said.

  “Good idea, let’s get started,” John replied.

  By early afternoon, the furniture was loaded and the four of them decided to take a break for lunch. Joanne ordered a pizza and while waiting for it to arrive, they sat down and enjoyed a cold beer.

  “Moving is certainly no fun,” Joanne said as she plopped down on the floor of her now empty living room.

  “And just think, when we get to my place, it all has to be carried in, unpacked and put away. I’ve cleared some space for your things, but some of it may have to go into storage,” Blake told her.

  Lyndsey watched the two of them, and even she had to admit, they seemed like the perfect couple. Amazing how those things work out sometimes.

  “So, Lyndsey, any progress in the job search?” Joanne asked.

  “Maeve has a friend who works for one of the local newspapers. She may mention to her about having me write some sort of weekly column. It would be a start, until something else comes along, I suppose.”

  “I think that would be great. What would you write about?”

  “I have no idea. Maeve suggested writing about writing, but I just don’t know.”

  “Hey, isn’t there an online site that gives advice to authors? Why don’t you check that out? You could write about editing and marketing.”

  “I’m looking for a paying job,” she reminded her.

  “I’m sure there is someone who would pay for that service.”

  “It’s not the same.”

  “You may never find the same type of job you had with Starlight,” John said.

  “I am beginning to think you may be right. Oh, the jobs are out there, but not in this area.”

  “Why not start your own publishing house? You and Joanne could do it together and work from your homes?” Blake suggested.

  “That’s a thought, but it would take a lot of startup and would be some time before we show any kind of profit,” Joanne added.

  The conversation ended when the pizza arrived. After the relaxing lunch, the group got back to work and by evening, the U-haul was loaded and ready to pull out the next morning.

  “Now, why don’t we all get cleaned up and go out for a nice meal?” John asked.

  “That sounds great, okay with you?” Blake glanced at Joanne.

  “Let’s get to our hotel and get ready and we can meet them somewhere. I need a nice, long shower.”

  “Where are you staying? We can just swing by and pick you up.” John suggested.

  “Oh, just at the Holiday Inn on the next block,” Joanne said. “We thought it would be better to get a good night’s sleep rather than camp out on the floor here.”

  “Good thinking. We’ll go home and run by the hotel in say, two hours.”

  “We’ll be ready,” Blake replied.

  “Text me when you’re on your way, Lyndsey,” Joanne said as she picked up her purse.

  “I will. I agree with you. Right now, all I want is a hot shower.”

  During the drive back, John said, “For a spring day, I certainly worked up a sweat. That girl has a lot of stuff.”

  “I’ll miss her,” Lyndsey replied.

  “It’s not like we can’t fly out there to visit. I do have to go occasionally on business. She’ll be back from time to time, too, I’m sure,” he said in an effort to console her.

  “That’s true,” she replied.

  When they returned to the condo, John grabbed a shower while Lyndsey relaxed on the deck with a glass of iced tea. It was a beautiful spring afternoon and she wished she could be more enthused about an evening out with friends.

  “The shower is all yours,” John said when he joined her a few minutes later.

  “I won’t be long,” she said as she stood up and went inside. When she walked out of the bathroom wrapped in a towel later, John was lying on the bed. She sat down on one of the chairs by the window and sighed.

  “What’s wrong,” he asked.

  “Just tired, I guess,” she replied.

  “We’d better get a move on if we want to pick them up on time,” he suggested as he got up and went to the closet.

  He began to get dressed and said, “I like the idea of you writing for a newspaper. Why didn’t you mention it to me sooner?”

  “I’m not so sure it’s what I want to do. I want to do what I did for Starlight.”

  “We’ve discussed that. It just doesn’t make any sense for me to close this office, sell the condo and pull up stakes again. I moved here for you. Now, can’t you give me the same consideration?”

  “That’s your final word and I’m just supposed to accept it, is that it? And you wonder why I feel I no longer have any control of my life.”

  “I’ve done my homework, Lyndsey. You can get a job doing exactly what you did at Starlight, working from home. Why isn’t that good enough for you?”

  “It’s just not the same.”

  “I’m not going to get into an argument about this now. We have plans for the evening.” He went to the closet and pulled out a floral skirt. He searched until he found the top she normally wore with it and threw the outfit on the bed. “Get dressed.”

  “I’m not going. I’ll call Joanne and tell her I have a headache.”

  “Oh, yes, you are going. We aren’t going to disappoint Blake and Joanne on her last night in town. Now, get dressed or I will do it for you!”

  She didn’t budge.

  Two long strides later and he was standing directly in front of her. He reached for her hand and pulled her up. Before she could react he had sat down in the chair she had been occupying and pulled her over his lap. The towel she had wrapped around her after her shower fell to the floor and she was naked and vulnerable once again.

  “What the hell do you think you’re doing?”

  “Showing y
ou what happens when you act like a spoiled child. Things aren’t going Lyndsey’s way, so Lyndsey throws a fit and pouts. Little girls who act like that often get their cute little asses spanked and that’s what you’re going to get right now. Maybe then, you’ll decide to get dressed and meet our friends for dinner, as planned. I told you this wasn’t the time to get into a discussion about your employment issues and I meant it.”

  “You’re insane!” she yelled as his right hand made contact with her exposed butt cheeks. Smack! She beat her fists against his leg, which made him even angrier.

  “I wasn’t aware I had married a spoiled brat,” he said as he spanked her again.

  She realized by this time that he meant business. Maybe she was acting out, but she had good reason. No one cared what she wanted. Everyone had their suggestions, but damn it, it was her life and her career.

  Once again, the hard slap of his hand on her ass sounded through the air. Her bottom hurt. But when the fourth smack hit her bottom, she began to calm down. Okay, perhaps she should have waited for a different time to try and reason with him about taking a job in a different locale.

  Another crack echoed through the air and by this time her ass was on fire.

  He lifted her up and told her to get dressed. Quietly, she obeyed. The conversation wasn’t over by a long shot, but he’d made his point. It wasn’t the time. She walked to the dresser and took out a pair of lace underwear and a matching bra. After putting them on, she went back to the bed and picked up the skirt, stepping into it before pulling the top over her head. Without a word, she walked to the closet and took out a pair of sandals, slipping her feet into them. After her makeup and hair were perfect, she joined him in the bedroom. “I’m ready.”

  He walked slowly toward her. When he reached her, he took her in his arms. “Lyndsey, I know this whole thing has turned your world upside down. We will discuss it again, I promise, just not tonight. Tonight, I want you to put a smile on your face and enjoy the evening. It’s Joanne’s night. Let her have it.”